Study reveals how donor-conceived families feel about discussing origin stories
Families' experiences of talking about donor-conception: How do caregivers and children feel when they discuss their origin stories? (Navarro, 2024)
Navarro, J. (2024). Families' experiences of talking about donor-conception: How do caregivers and children feel when they discuss their origin stories? [Preprint]. University Alberto Hurtado. https://doi.org/10.22541/au.173046967.79999052/v1
Geographic Region: Chile
Research Question: How do families with donor-conceived children experience talking about conception stories and how do both caregivers and children feel during these conversations?
Design: Descriptive exploratory qualitative study using a naturalistic approach. The researcher asked families to record origin-story conversations with their children in their own homes, without the researcher present, at a time of the family’s choosing. Parents then conducted brief semi-structured interviews with their children immediately after the origin conversation, asking five questions about the child’s emotional experience and favorite/least favorite parts of the story. The researcher next conducted semi-structured interviews with parents exploring context (who tells, when, frequency, terminology), their emotional experience of telling the story, and reflection on the recorded conversation through audio feedback. Data collection occurred between late 2024 and early 2025. Interview analysis using open coding based on grounded theory principles.
Sample: 45 individuals from 17 families participated, including 19 donor-conceived children (11 female; 8 male) ranging in age from 3 to 8 years (mean age 4.9 years). Caregiver mean age was 41.4 years. Family structures included 5 heterosexual couples, 6 female same-sex couples, and 6 single mothers by choice. Most families (12) used sperm donation, 3 used egg donation, and 2 used double donation through fertility clinics with cryobanks located in the USA, Spain, or Chile. Younger parents and children tended to be in lesbian families; older children were in heterosexual families; older parents were single mothers by choice. All parents held college degrees. All participants were living in Chile at the time of the study and self-identified as Latino/a. All families had already disclosed donor conception or were certain they intended to do so. Donor type varied: some families used identity-release donors (contact information available to the child at age 18), some used anonymous donors (no identifying information ever available), and one family used an informal sperm donor contacted through social media. Recruitment used three channels: social media advertisements, community organizations serving single mothers by choice and lesbian families, and fertility clinic counselors.
Editor’s Note: The numbers in this study are used to describe patterns, not to make statistical claims.
Key Findings
Parents approached these conversations in different ways. Some were very comfortable being open about using a donor from the start, while others chose to tell because they worried keeping secrets could harm their children later. Same-sex couples were usually the most comfortable talking about it. The timing of these conversations varied significantly among families, and many initiated discussions around ages 3-4.
Parents weren't usually worried about whether to tell their children - instead, they worried about when was the right time to tell and what words to use. Some parents carefully planned these talks, while others let the conversations happen naturally. Story-telling was a multi-layered process that evolved over time.
Most children had positive feelings about their origin stories. Young children were especially interested in hearing about being in their mother's tummy and about their birth. However, some children also had more difficult feelings. Some felt different from other kids, particularly when they realized not all families were created the same way. A few children expressed sadness about not having a father or felt uncomfortable hearing about donors. The older children (around 7-8 years old) started thinking more deeply about what it meant to be donor-conceived and how it related to who they are.
Limitations: Single country study. Relatively small sample. All families had already decided to disclose. Limited age range of children.
Applications: This study highlights the need to support families in developing communication strategies and recognizes disclosure as ongoing process, not single event. Support should consider cultural context and different family structures.
Funding Source Not specified
Lead Author: Javiera Navarro-Marshall is a Chilean psychologist and academic at the Facultad de Psicología, Universidad Alberto Hurtado in Santiago, Chile. Her research focuses on parent-child communication, autobiographical memory, and donor-conceived family storytelling. She is a parent through donor conception.
Regulatory Context:
Chile has no comprehensive legislation governing assisted reproductive technology or donor conception. ART practices are regulated by the ethics committees of individual medical centers, not by national law. Most clinics voluntarily adhere to standards set by the Latin American Network of Assisted Reproduction (REDLARA).
The only relevant national legal provision is an article of Chile’s Civil Code stipulating that the father and mother are presumed to be the persons who voluntarily used ART, meaning legal parentage follows intent, not genetics. In the absence of marriage, paternity must be voluntarily acknowledged.
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